it's raining on upper china tonight

i was totally down for days, i was looking for flights back home, i couldn't eat for a few days... i'm still sad but i can't and don't have the time to go deeper into heart and head-aches even if it hurts. i want to thank you in sweden for just talking with me, being there. not having anyone but just my own thoughts can make me go slightly crazy. it was funny how i one morning got over all this though. it was about 6am your time and i was having coffee in the kitchen, checking my mail and drinking coffee while watching the electrician (i hate elvin) doing his work. and i got a IM on facebook from someone i least expected to say hi. he had some nice things to say which made me laugh like mad and blush infront of the computer screen. he said things totally suprising for me and it just made my day. as easy as that. good timing there my friend!

i'm tired like hell all the time, i have had some cough and my body temperature has been higher a couple of days. been trying to do some work anyway. like more or less successful attempts on hanging those damn balls from the ceiling, cleaning and clearing up the 1st floor, today i cleaned the staircase and did some sweeping on the top floor. tomorrow i guess i take the ground floor. interesting huh? hehe

i got a textmessage this morning which i still find quite lame.
"GOD's WAY IS THE BEST:
One day i asked God a bunch of beautiful flowers,
but instead, He gave me a cactus with thorns.

Later i asked Him to give me butterflies,
but instead He gave me worms.

I was disappointed and wept. But, few days after,
i have noticed that the cactus bloomed with beautiful
flowers and the worms soon became butterflies.

God wants us to wait for the right time,
for He knows all the best that He can give."

it was a guy texting me this, haha, i replied "cute, i'm an atheist". i didn't get an answer. thank GOD!

the time is already past 9pm here. i'm sitting in the kitchen having some coffee while listening to the rain outside hitting the windows and pouring in the drain. the alley is quiet tonight. just some distant sounds of cars driving by on the main street. the family next doors is quiet, the dog is quiet. i wish this rain could wash away what has been and let the sun of the dawn bring some new fresh energy to this building....

the other day i came in contact with some punks from indonesia, seem like ok people, they have a band and the lyrics are in indonesian http://www.myspace.com/realitas hehe :)